So I went off on this the other day in my Facebook status because, like the title of this blog, I just can’t take this shit any more. People complain about how bad their lives are, or in short, say “FML.” If you live under a rock and don’t know the acronym, it stands for “fuck my life.” Something so tragic has happened to these people that they really hate their lives. Usually, something along the lines of, “holy shit Burger King took 30 extra seconds to make my fries and now I’m waiting at a red light, FML.” Really? You had to wait 30 seconds at Burger King, I feel so sorry for you. It’s funny, because you’re complaining about being able to drive somewhere to get food that’s prepared for you at your convenience. That’s fucking terrible, what a shitty life. You know who I’m sure would kill someone to have that life??
That kid. You know when he says “FML?” When he’s running from a fucking lion that’s about to mangle his body and eat him for a snack. You think he complains when he drops his food..oh…no wait, he doesn’t even get food to drop. Again, another great time for this kid to say FML, when he realizes he hasn’t eaten in over 3 weeks. Clearly your life sucks far worse than his because you realized you had a man-stain on your shirt and now “that boy” is laughing at you.
Your house just blew up, along with two houses connected to yours…also, your family died in the blast. THAT is a time when you can say fuck my life. Ohhhh I’m sorry, again, how silly of me to think your phone getting a scratch on the screen isn’t comparable to something like this. You’re right, fuck your life.
I just can’t stand seeing this shit any more. We live in a country where we have it 400x better than most places in the world. The fact that you’re able to buy a pair of shoes at your own will, and wear stupid ass shit like bright pink collared shirts should be enough to make you realize your life really isn’t that bad.